


have we been here before?

by xionia97



Category: Devilman (Anime & Manga)
Genre: Ambiguous/Open Ending, Canon - Manga, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Fluff, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Nightmares, but manga cannon was what i had in mind while writing, can be read as ova characterisation, no beta we die like men, this is so shit i haven’t even proofread it, this might be a oneshot but i might end up adding a second chapter
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-18
Updated: 2020-10-18
Packaged: 2021-03-09 04:48:22
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,305
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27079084
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/xionia97/pseuds/xionia97
Summary: Ryo’s been having nightmares. Akira suspects Ryo hasn’t been getting enough sleep, so he stays the night.
Relationships: Asuka Ryo | Satan & Fudo Akira, Asuka Ryo | Satan/Fudo Akira
Comments: 3
Kudos: 91





	have we been here before?

How long had Ryo been there? Days? Months? Years? He didn’t know, and he didn’t care. Instead, his focus was entirely on the boy - or rather, the torso of the boy, that laid in his pals arms. The stench of blood and ash plagued his senses, but he didn’t spare a thought about it. After all, he quickly became accustomed to the stench. 

He only wanted to scream, to yell, to curse the God that placed him in this eternal Hell, he wanted God to hear his pleas. But he wouldn’t listen, as the only sounds that escaped Ryos pink lips were cracked sobs and whispers of Akira’s name and apologies that couldn’t be heard. 

With a gasp, his eyes opened, and he was back in his room. 

Another dream. 

Ryo held his head, which was pounding with a headache (he hadn’t even drank any alcohol this time), his bones and back and legs felt as if something was gnawing at them, chewing at his flesh from the inside and aching to be free. This happened every time one of these dreams occurred, which was increasingly often. He was shaking, too. Trembling, in fact - which was quite an unfamiliar feeling to him. 

Ryo looked at the walls of his room. He studied every object he could see from his bed. Everything felt so familiar, yet so foreign at the same time. 

He’s done this before. He can’t explain why or how. But, he knows he’s done all this before and he knows it.

He sighed, swinging his legs over the side of the bed and stumbled his way over to the kitchen to make a coffee. He glanced at the clock that hung above the stove. 4:37 am. Damn, he had only been asleep for three hours. 

_Looks like I won’t be going back to sleep anyway._ Ryo sighed as he stirred the boiling hot coffee. Deciding to read a book and play a VHS tape in the background to distract himself, he quickly walked back up to his room with his coffee, making sure to pick up the tape from he living room on the way there. 

* * *

He reached into the top cabinet and pulled out a bottle of painkillers - it was the least he could do to stop the pain. He made a coffee and took one out, placing it in his mouth with a sip of the drink. Ryo sighed and sat on one of the kitchen chairs, slumping slightly and not caring for his bad posture. 

He glanced at the clock above the stove. 6am. It’s too early to call people now. Noticing that he only got three (or maybe four? He didn’t remember) hours of sleep, Ryo walked back up to the bedroom, placed the tape into the VHS and flopped onto his bed. 

Shouldn’t have drank that coffee. Though he did suppose that it wasn’t long before he should get up anyway. Admittedly, while he certainly wasn’t a morning person, he still made an attempt at waking up early (though he often regretted such a routine due to his habit of staying up late). 

He had stopped shaking by now, and while the pain was still present, it was much more bearable than before. 

Everything was okay, now, right? _Right?_

* * *

Ryo waited outside the school gates, as usual, waiting for Akira to finish school. 

“Ryo!” A familiar voice called out, running towards him. 

“Akira!” Ryo smiled, walking towards Akira

“How’re you?” Akira asked, giving his usual toothy grin. They greeted each other with a hug and a small kiss 

“I’m alright. How are you?”

“Hungry”

“Of course you are” Ryo said with a giggle and rolled his eyes. “Do you want to get something to eat?” He asked. 

“Hell yes!” Akira smiled. 

They went to some fast food restaurant. Not Ryo’s ideal place to eat at all, but Akira chose it and he couldn’t object. 

The restaurant was nice enough, a checker tiled floor and red and white walls. The seasons were lined with fabric and had individual booths by the windows. It was nice, _for a greasy, cheap fast food chain run by greedy businessesmen and capitalists._

“So,” Akira took a bite out of his burger andinterrupted Ryo’s train of thought, “Any demons around lately?”

“No, not that I know of. Doesn’t mean that they’re not around, though, so we should still be wary. They just may not have made themselves known yet” 

Akira hummed and took another bite. He stared at Ryo for a few seconds, as if he was analysing his face. Just as Ryo was about to ask him what was wrong, Akira said, “Dude. You look really tired. You sure you’re o-“

“-Yeah, I’m fine, don’t worry about it”

“Hm. Don’t stay up too late, okay? I worry about you sometimes” Akira seemed like he didn’t believe Ryo’s insistence that he was _fine_ , which slightly irritated the other boy. “How much sleep _have_ you been getting?”

_Around three hours, but I doubt Akira wants to hear that._

After a pause, Ryo answered with a shrug,”Enough”. Akira frowned, “...Okay. I’m staying over, though”

“What?! Why?”

“You look tired and I wanna make sure you’re getting a good amount of sleep”

“I - You really don’t have to”

“No, but I want to!” Akira smiled again. 

_I don’t want you seeing how much of a fucking mess I am after these nightmares._

* * *

It was around 10pm, maybe, and Akira and Ryo had already eaten dinner. Akira was half asleep, barely listening to the music playing softly in the background. Ryo was trying his best not to fall asleep, knowing that it’ll just end in another nightmare. 

Eventually, he did. 

This time, he dreamt of a destroyed city. Rubble surrounded him, as he sat on a piece of, what used to be, wall. He felt… different. Perhaps, _free_ is the word. Though it was a feeling he couldn’t yet accurately describe. Later, he had wings, again. And he was fighting Akira, again. 

These dreams were always the same - a recurring nightmare. Ended the same, too. 

Ryo was always laid next to Akira - or what was left of him as tears fell down his face. Angels descended from the sky, and while they never showed their anger on their “perfect” faces, he could feel the seething hatred each individual held for him. 

The worst part was the sense of familiarity the dream brought with it. He always felt as if he’s done all of this before, long ago. 

“Ryo!” 

Ryo’s eyes shot open.

He was shaking and that _godawful_ pain was back. Akira looked at him with worry evident on his face. “Ryo you’re - you’re shaking. Did you have a nightmare or something?”

“Yes”

“Do you remember it?”

Ryo took a moment to answer, “Sort of. There was angels and - and—“ he couldn’t continue, thoughts of what ‘he’ (was it him?) did to Akira in his dream flooding back. 

_It’s just a dream, it’s fine. Everything is fine. But why does this feel so wrong? Why are they affecting me so much? It’s just a nightmare._

_Right?_

“Hey, hey, it’s okay, you’re okay” 

Ryo didn’t even realise he was crying until now. Akira hugged him tight, and Ryo hugged back. 

“I’m sorry if I worried you” Ryo whispered

“No, it’s fine, you don’t need to be sorry for that!” Akira laughed slightly. 

“Akira?”

“Yeah?”

“I love you”

“I-I love you too”

They shared a soft, sweet kiss and Ryo smiled as he looked in the other boy’s eyes. 

“I’m going to make a coffee. Would you like one?” Ryo asked as Akira nodded. He got up and walked out of the room, leaving Akira on his own. 

Out of the corner of his eye, Akira saw a small, red figure with large eyes standing outside the window. 


End file.
